My Vices

how do i tell him that he is asking me to give up something that i truly enjoy? its not that i need it, or even that it will hurt not to have it. but it hurts that he wants me to stop doing something that helps me unwind and calm myself. i've never done that to him. i will honor his request, and i know that he will read this. he may take it back and he may not. but even if he does, it is only because he will feel guilty. i will do it for him, but i will not be happy about it. he should know not to talk about it to me again unless i bring it up. we will get past this and it won't be a big deal after awhile, but right now... well, give me time to cool off.

My Love

you guys should read what he wrote. he's wonderful! however, you'd have to ask him for a copy. i finally had a chance to edit some of his work from a hard copy. trust me, i can do major things on a hard copy. just ask eric. if i'd had a red pen, it would have looked like he failed. but, all criticism is constructive. i really enjoyed getting into the nitty-gritty details. eric has a problem with with hes and hims getting confusing, for instance. please guys, send me a copy of your writing, i can print it off and really give you feedback.

on a totally different note, hopefully soon i will have long nails! you all know how badly i bite my nails. well, i want to walgreens and got a nail polish that nourishes and promotes growth ($2.59) and a product called "thum" that helps people stop biting their nails and children stop sucking their thumbs. i can name all the ingredients involved in thum: cayenne pepper, citric acid, isopropyl alcohol, and laquer. all i can taste is cayenne pepper when i put a finger in my mouth. not so fun when i go to get sleep out of my eye or pick my nose (right now my nose is burning because i had to pick it). i can't wait to have long nails for once!

until later, keighdee

My Thought For The Day

psychology is boring when you don't feel good. we even have a really good prof, but i just cannot pay attention. and next class, i get to watch a horrible movie called medea. yay greek. school sucks now and i am being all emo and bitching about school, but i just don't care. i really want to either eat something or throw up. i know one will make me feel better, but i really can't do either. fuck me, this sucks. i have to go now because we have to write a writing assignment in class. yippee.

My Future - God What A Scary Thought

i was reading through everyone's blogs and something chris said in his first post made me want to talk about my future. chris mentioned playing off others' creativity, and that is exactly what i do. i always thought i was creative. i went into theatre for that reason. i tried to be a set designer... and failed. i tried to be a makeup artist... and failed. i tried to be a director... and, of course, failed. finally i realized that i am creative, but only when given a head start.
that was about the time that eric started getting serious about his writing, and i started reading it and ripping it apart. sometimes he would come to me with ideas, but he just didn't know where to go with them. now, i could never have come up with those ideas myself, but i knew exactly where they could go given full potential. there were quite a few stories where my ideas were not exactly used, but gave birth to a bevy of other, better ideas. i decided to be a book editor.
i could be good. i realize that now. i have a lot to learn and am looking forward to it, but i am already good. i still want chris to start that publishing company, but now i am realistic about my options. even if we start a company, i have to pay my dues at another company as a proofer or a copyright filer. i understand and accept. i just want to edit books.
this is getting a little long, but i have one thing i want to get across if nothing else does. i have never, ever had a passion for anything. even falling in love with eric was calm and subtle. but right now, writing this post, my chest is feathery inside, i am sitting up straight, and i'm sure that if a mirror was in front of me, i would see stars in my eyes. i want to edit books. so please, my writer friends, send me your manuscripts. send me hard copies to edit. i would love to. know that i will be harsh. i may even tell you that your story is crap, but i will be constructive. help me realize the only passion i have ever had.

The Beginning

Hello, all! I'm not a writer, like all of you, so I probably won't post nearly as often or well. But I want you know what's going on with me and it seems a good way to communicate. Also, I could do some of my comments on pieces you all have written. Let's see how my blog goes!